Do you ever feel yourself float away from your physical body and wonder why does past keeps repeating itself?
Have you ever experience so much pain that you can even forget what pain is like?
Do you ever want to cry over this kind of things?
Well...for me...I don't have much of a say...
A punch,then a kick in the ribs,followed by a glass bottle being hit against you till it shatters as blood slowly kept running from your head.
My vision was turning to hazy.I don't know why but I am getting a little dizzy.I carelessly thought.
[A/N:Girl!You did not even faint!]
Furthermore,a group of girls blocking the path like they are the great wall of china...
"such a bother..."I mumbled quietly as they can't hear me.
"Be quiet and mind your own business!You got that?"Lily hisses at me through clenched teeth as she slowly roll her eyes.
Lily is well known as the most popular girl and the nicest girl in our class...well at least for everybody except for me who later found out her dirty little secret and you probably know what it is...
"and what if I don't want to?Goddess of all?" I mocked."or should I say little miss two-faced?..."I sneered at the sight of her being an actress and a drama queen as her face turned bright red,flushed with anger and torment. Without hesitation she kicked me in the ribs again while her so called sidekicks imitated her as my vision slowly faded away making me slowly faint.
"W-where am I?..."I mumbled as I slowly open my eyes and realized I was in the infirmary.I sat up and saw Mary the nurse looking at me.
"Oh!You are awake!Thank goodness!I was so worried that you might need to go to the hospital in that situation again..."said Mary,smiling at me with relief drawn on her face.
Mary who is in charged in the infirmary always sees me in this situation and almost everyday... but she never cares...she said that she is worried but...rather than a troubled face she just...smiles...well it's not like I feel sad or anything...after all...I AM ALREADY EMOTIONLESS...
"You should lie down a bit and rest,I'll just inform your teachers that something came up...and I will wake you up after class ends...okay?"She said with a reassuring smile while pinning me down slowly and carefully tucking me in,in the white blanket.
"Okay..."I replied with a cold tone as usual,as I slowly fell to slumber.
As I woke up I saw a beam of light in front of me.Where am I again?I looked side to side as I wonder locating where this place was... then realized I was still in the infirmary.I looked at the time on the clock hanging on the wall above the door and it was stated as "3:50 pm".
"Hah?It's almost 4:00..."I mumbled to myself as I get up from bed, grabbing my things while running away from the infirmary.
It was awfully so noisy today,well maybe because I am in the streets.
As I walk down the streets I see a lot of people crossing the pedestrian lines,bickering around,the fresh air,hearing the sound of a heavy traffic,vehicles running side to side and a color of a red shoe worn by a kid,sticking like a sore thumb in the crowd,immediately flashed in my mind.
It was a rainy day in the Hans household.
"Mommy,daddy!I want a red shoe for my birthday,today!"
"Red shoe?but they stick out like a sore thumb...never mind...what kind?..."Mom asked.
"You know...the ones that I can wear..."
"We can always wear every shoe,Chitsuni!but what kind of shoe?"Mom exclaimed.
"ummmm...a shoe!"I smiled.
Mom face palmed herself with a face almost bursting out to laugh.
"I really can't...y-you are too cute..."She stuttered
"Huh?"I curiously exclaimed with my head slightly tilted to the right side while looking at mom's green almond eyes.
"Okay~..I'll buy you a red shoe..."
Red shoe really stick out like a sore thumb and they really do made me remind of my nightma-....As I was about to finish my thoughts, I accidentally bumped into someone that brought me out to reality.
I fell and bumped my buttocks very hard on the ground as a hand slowly reaching out to me.
"Are you okay?..."The boy said,while reaching his hand.
"Sorry..."I replied with a cold tone.
"It's oka-..."Before he could finish his sentence he was cut off by me running away.
Now that was careless of me...I carelessly thought.As I was running down the street heading to my destination,I felt a sudden cramp of my left leg.Although I can't feel it,it's still manage to shut me and my foot from walking away.
I slowly bent down my knees and observing what was my situation.As expected,it was sore sprain.
Now my other foot is numb and my body is also getting tired from running...how am I supposed to get home now without being scolded?
My other foot is badly swollen but that doesn't mean I can stop from walking home.
I started walking with one foot backing me up while I just try to lift my swollen foot up, hoping and avoiding not to fall.As I look around, I saw a sense of familiarity to where my house was.
It was a white gate and a car being parked beside it where my closest neighbor lives at and the next gate was none other than mine.
As I noticed that I was near my house,I suddenly felt the urge to run away to where I was as fast as I can as I was dead tired to step any footsteps longer.
By the time I arrived in front of my gate I started to feel dizzy again that made me walk, jiggling like an octopus.
As I entered my room I suddenly fell on my knees and collapsed on my bed, slowly my mind went blank.
" Wh-where am I again?-..."
"Oh...yeah...I am in my room...I thought I was in my dream again..." As I slowly turn to the right side of my bed a sudden appearance of a woman's face,who is sneering creepily, appeared in front of me that made me stunned for a moment.
I rapidly sit up from my bed avoiding the woman's gaze because I know for the thought that she was none other than my crazy lunatic aunt who comes to bother me again.
"Hi aunt..." I greeted.
I really should have bought a dream catcher next time...
I don't know why but I got the feeling of dreaming a nightmare again...
"Why are you late again?..." She asked.
"There was an urgent appeal for assistance of my club earlier so I didn't manage to get home early, sorry..." I apologized as I looked at her face who turned blank.
"Hmmm?...ok?..." She mumbled.
She was my aunt.She became like this after knowing that her husband which is my uncle now was a womanizer and a drunkyard.Still I feel a little bit of pity and compassion about her because she was the only one who insisted on taking me in, preventing me to go to the orphanage as I was still not the age of 18.An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, right?
"Aunty?...did you eat dinner, already?" I gently asked then she slightly nodded in response.
"How about going to sleep?..." She became silent for a moment.
"When are you going to get a boyfriend, honey?" She bluntly asked.
No,not this topic again...
"Aunty?...when are you going to stop that nonsense?-..."
"I ASKED!PLEASE ANSWER ME!" She screamed as I instantly shut my mouth up, not in the mood to go to a quarrel again.
"Oops!sorry...I got a little out there...didn't I?..." She sincerely apologize because she noticed that she was a little rude.
"Don't worry, I don't mind..."
Since I already get used to this...
"BUT!IF YOU EVER...EVER...GET ONE?!p-please don't ever... pick a b-bastard like your u-uncle..."She stuttered slowly making her tears fall apart from her eyes as I used my hand to wipe them away gently.
"Sure,why would I?"I carelessly said to myself as the thought of uncle being a lazy drunk yard and womanizer boyfriend.
"Please...Chinitsu-..." Then she collapsed out of stress as I swiftly catched her, holding her waist and back as I slowly carried her to her room.
That was pretty exhausting...My aunt is so pitiful...
If I was her I would already have divorced him and left him with nothing to get pay back...but...too bad she was blinded by love.
She still believed that bastard's explanation even know it was obvious he was lying.
How oblivious can she be?
I reached out my hand towards the ceiling thinking about the past memories of my uncle witnessing the whole scene of him hooking up with a woman in the bar made me suddenly clench like I was catching the stars.
Huh?how long has it been this way?when did I became cold as ice and snow again...
Oh yeah...I remember now...that nightmare I started...
Still though...what surprises me is that I can't feel pain...and yet my heart aches everytime I got physically hit...
Is this some kind of magic...the more physically damaged body I get, the more heart ache I receive...
This is some kind of witchcraft,right?
I stood up from my bed,watching myself on a mirror and looking at my reflection as I saw a lot of visible bruises on my face,hands, arms,even in my legs and a dash of scratches included like it was caused by a cat's paws even though it was from the people who abused me.
Now what am I gonna do about all of this now, huh?
I wish I have magic so that I can make this all,disappear...
I can at least be at ease of being physically abused if my wounds immediately get healed after...what am I pondering about?!...
Where did I put the ointment again?-...
As I was about to find my ointment,I saw my reflection slowly fading away then a boy appeared in front of me in the mirror,smirking at me that brought me out of my thoughts.
At first,I thought I was hallucinating as I rubbed my eyes but he was still there smirking at me...I felt even more terrified than I was before and it was my first time I have ever felt fear since I lost all my emotions that day...then he suddenly spoke to me...
"Oh!Hi there!...You must be wondering why I can speak and why I appeared out of nowhere...But,anyways!Nice to meet you I am Zuto Kakuhako!My name is pretty weird right?...I am gonna be your companion from now on..."He said as he closed his eyes happily smiling at me.
"EH?!"I was shocked.
" Wh-who are YOU?!!!"
GREAT!Now I am more crazy and a lunatic than my aunt!
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