I must write this. I am not good at keeping a journal but I need to leave a message to those loved ones just in case something happens to me. They need to know the truth...
It all started a week ago. I followed my everyday routine like always. I woke up early in the morning, had a shower, made breakfast, and left for work. And this is the exact time I realized something strange was happening...
For you to understand I must tell you something about myself. I dream every night, I dream in colors, and I dream in other languages even those which I don't speak fluently. In my dreams I feel everything: I hear sounds, I taste food, smell perfumes, and feel cold or warm. I even sense the textures I dream of at my fingertips. But most importantly, I remember all my dreams in detail. Not only that, but I also daydream and when I do I lose track of time or my surroundings; I don't hear it see what's around me, I am like a nightwalker but in plain day.
Again, what's important is that I remember whatever I dream of in full detail. Daydreaming is very dangerous because it always happens when I am on the streets and I cross the streets without noticing the cars or even hearing when angry drivers honk or shout at me.
Remembering my dream is what alerted me that something strange was going on...
As I walked to work, I noticed that I had dreamt that day. First, I saw an old lady walking her dog when suddenly a flowerpot fell from a balcony and almost hit her little Beagle. She looked up and watched the balconies while she shouted, "Watch out, you might kill somebody!"
Déjà vu! That was when it struck me. I saw that scene in my dream. The lady was wearing the same light blue dress she wore in my dream. I walked past a shop and I watched my reflection in the window. I was bewildered. I was wearing what I saw I wore in my dream. It must be a coincidence, I mean, maybe I was wearing this because I decided to wear it after I dreamt of wearing this.
The day went on in a very boring way since I knew all the gossip my coworkers would tell. Why? Because I dreamt of this conversation! Nobody noticed anything odd about my behavior. But I watched the sequence of events as if I was going through a crime scene. I wanted to know if anything else I dreamt would happen. It did. One of my colleagues was walking back to her desk after pouring herself a cup of coffee. One of her stiletto heels broke, she fell, and the coffee cup broke as soon as it touched the floor. Several people, including myself, helped the lady back to her feet. I didn't have words to describe what was going on in my mind. Was last night's dream simply that or a premonition?
As a scientist wanting to find the truth, I decided to test my hypothesis. On my way home I thought about what had happened next in my dream. I remembered going back home and getting ready to fix dinner when I noticed I didn't have potatoes, therefore I bought some on my way home. As I predicted, there weren't any at home.
In the following two days, I confirmed that my dreams were indeed premonitions.
I decided to see if I could change anything from what I would dream that night and watch if after changing any event, the spell would be broken, and I would go back to being uncertain about the future.
I ate, washed the dishes, had a shower, brushed my teeth, and went to bed early. I started my dream as always with a romantic scene. I saw myself on top of the Empire State Building waiting for Cary Grant. After an unknown amount of time, my dreams went back to my daily life. When the slam went off in the morning, I already knew what will happen that day.
Determined to change my fate, I decided to change the day. I had dreamt I witnessed a car crash on my way to work, and I had to go to the police station to give my statement. I knew where it would happen, so I decided to change my route to work to avoid the car crash. I didn't know if that would stop the accident from happening but at least I wouldn't have to go to the police station.
I know it sounds selfish but I was trying to prove my hypothesis. Besides, I couldn't do anything to prevent the accident from happening.
I changed the route to work and started thinking about how that little action would change my day. I wouldn't be late for work, and the conversation with my colleagues would change.
While I was lost thinking about this, I felt a hand on my wrist pulling me back, and I heard someone mumbling, "Watch out!". Then I hear car honks, brake screeching, cars crashing, and car windows smashing.
When I got back to my senses I saw I had accidentally returned to my usual route to work and I was standing at the corner of the street where the accident in my dream had happened.
Needless to say, I had to call my boss to tell him I was going to be late because I needed to go to the police station. I waited for the ambulance to come, and then a police car drove me to the nearest police station. I couldn't say I was daydreaming at the time the fatal accident occurred so I decided to tell the exact sequence of events I had seen in my dream. The officer who stopped me when I was about to cross the street corroborated my statement. He saw the same thing.
The rest of the day happened exactly like in my dream. The following day I couldn't change any event.
I was getting anxious. These premonitions set off my long-forgotten panic attacks. I was becoming paranoid.
On Thursday evening I tried to change things before I went to sleep.
Today I was going to change my evening routine. On my way home, I bought some fruit and chocolate.
As soon as I entered the house, I lit some scented candles, prepared the bathroom with scented oils, melted the chocolate, washed the fruit and cut it into little cubes, put the fondue, the fruit, and a glass of white wine on a tray, and went into the bathroom. I relaxed in the bathtub, in a candle-lighted bathroom, while I ate and drank. Then I lingered in the tub relaxing, and doing meditation and breathing exercises. I finally got out of the bathtub. I pampered myself with skin care products and a little facial massage. By midnight I went to bed.
As every night, I dreamt. First a romantic scene, Robert Redford was fixing an egg sandwich in a pan for breakfast as he did in the movie Havana. As I was enjoying my dream, I slumbered into my premonition for the next day.
On Friday, I woke up. I had goosebumps when I remembered my dream. In that dream, I was going to die! I knew the exact time of my death, the place. I knew where it would happen. The way I would die, what I would feel the moment I died. I knew everything except for one thing.
One little piece of information was missing: 'If' and 'how' I could prevent my death. So far, I couldn't change anything from my previous dreams.
I decided to fix myself a delicious breakfast; if this was going to be my last meal, it had to be special. I put on nice clothes so the forensic pathologist would find me wearing matching nice underwear in case I failed to change my fate. I cleaned my house and tidied my room.
Like a little child, I got on my knees beside my bed, placed my elbows on the mattress, and prayed. I made peace with God.
Before going out to work she wrote down her dream and what she did up to the moment of writing her journal. She placed the journal on the coffee table near the entrance door along with a letter to her family.
She went out of the house and walked her usual route to work when suddenly someone shouted, "Watch out!"...
Obrigado pela leitura!
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