A
AXL coronado


The story shows a 17-year-old who is in the last year of school, he lives in his own world full of darkness, the same one that follows him until a fucking critic, until he takes the step to take his own life. But will meeting that person change it? Or will the darkness end up consuming him?


Drame Tout public.

#drama #depressive #236 #345 #258 #239 #378 #youth #realistic
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At the border

PRESENT. (11:30 pm). In somewhere in Tokyo.

Tonight and on this bridge will be where everything will end. I will do what I have long expected. I will take my life.

Since I got up I have felt strange, those thoughts that I feared so much before, returned and increasingly stronger, taking me to this point, sitting on this bridge questioning my pathetic existence.

I remember how when I was little (11 years old) loneliness terrified me, desperately trying my best to try to fit in, but it was useless. I didn't want to accept my reality, I just ignored it. (Although I did not fully understand, I just stopped trying) But when I met him it was clear. Tadashi a classmate approached me saying that he wanted to be my friend, at that moment I thought he was only doing it out of pity, so I just ignored him. (I really would have preferred it to be that way) In one of my days, I was on the ground being beaten by some boys from school, I did not defend myself because I he had an ideology, if he answered he would be like them. I just didn't have to do anything but he suddenly got in front of me trying to defend me, but it was useless, those guys didn't listen to him for a second. They began to beat each other, among many blows he received a very strong one that knocked him down, lying on the ground with his dirty shirt and a little blood, that idiot forced me to forget my stupid ideology, I jumped on the person in charge, I furiously started to hit him non-stop, I was completely haunted by anger, but once again that busybody held my foot, trying to make it stop, that's when I heard, (don't be the same as them, this is not you. * After that, he fainted *). (The next day he would not believe what he would hear). Tadashi died, apparently the blows he had received were very serious. Given that news, a part of me wanted to take the blame, but no, don't accept it, That idiot if only he hadn't meddled, this wouldn't have happened. (In that way, days passed) and during that time, it was where those thoughts arose, began to invade me, the voices in my damn head. I somehow wanted to die. But I could not do it myself, so much was my weakness, that I prayed to a god of which I am not a believer, I was so desperate that every night with tears in my eyes I asked him that please, for me there would not be another day. Despite saying that he was afraid, he pretended to be strong but in reality he was terrified, he was afraid, Lose was pathetic, disgusting, pitiful, miserable, weak, but he did not know what to do.

Now these thoughts came back but stronger. What am I supposed to feel? Should I be afraid? Am I supposed to cry? No no no. I promised myself never to cry again, whatever happens. Now he is completely different, that little coward does not exist anymore. Now this is different. The fear of that time disappeared.

My body supports these thoughts. I feel like everything I had repressed begins to invade me, it suffocates me. I can not stand it anymore! (He picked me up and pressed my hands against the edge of the Bridge, stared down)

I don't mind dying, less in a place like this, I had to do it for a long time and now I finally have the courage to do it (I show a small smile) finally this ends ...

PAST: (5:00 AM) 6 hours before the event.

I haven't been able to sleep well, in fact I haven't slept well these days, my eyes look tired and I have dark circles around them. Since I came to this place I have felt stranger than normal.

(6:37 AM)

Today I decide to go to school, although classes started 3 days ago, this will be my first day. Well, the reason I missed her is that I just moved into this house and on the other hand I hate introductions. But, I don't really care, as it is very common to miss the first few days.

6:50 AM

I left home quickly, since school is far away. The closer I get to the city, I notice how little by little the tranquility and silence are broken. At first they suggested that I live here but I decided to go to a quieter place a bit away from the city.

I don't know the city very much, because since I arrived I have limited myself to going out, which is why it is my first time that I am very far from home.

Not leaving the house is a habit of mine, and when I do it is usually at night. Besides, I have the habit of always wearing a hood that covers my face.

(8:40 AM)

I was walking for a long time, I did not perfectly remember the location of the school ... The fault is mine, since previously they taught me the school in passing but I did not pay attention, so thanks to my distraction, I was wandering around a place that I was familiar with, in short ... I got lost ... But luckily a boy passed by in the same uniform. So I followed him without him noticing.

Anyway. I arrived at the school but apparently late since no student was out of the classrooms, I went directly to my classroom that indicated in the schedule, upon entering I waited for a complaint from the teacher, but it was not done, indeed, I did not even arrive.

All the students were inside, the classroom almost full. I had no idea where to sit, so I went to the back as there were 2 empty seats next to each other. Logically, I took the one that was dirtiest since I assumed that if the other chair is clean, it has an owner, but it had not yet arrived ...

Two minutes passed since the teacher arrived and the teacher came in, he took some time, left his suitcase on his table, and then with a loud voice said the following: —good morning young people, since I realized that today some students are joining new. So before we start the class I ask you to come up here and introduce yourself please.

Wow, how lucky is mine. In the end I was right, it is very common to miss the first days.

A few seconds passed and someone stood up, followed by another two and well, I have left. I had to do it too.

Once the 4 at the front, one by one began to introduce themselves, soft whispers could be heard among those who were seated, but without any inconvenience. Once the three finished It was my turn, I just have to do the same as the others, say my name and age.

"My name is Kat ...

—Excuse me for interrupting you but before you continue, could you take off the hood that is covering your face a bit. (Said the professor.)

The hood? Oh yeah. I forgot ... Without further ado, I took it off, at that moment I did, the classroom became silent for a moment ... but little by little it was broken by whispers that became louder.

A scar on my face. That's what the hood covered. And now what I'm thinking will begin. This is one of the reasons why I wear the hood, to avoid these situations. I get used to going out with a hood so much that I usually forget that I have it on, it is as if it were part of my body.

From the moment I enter the classroom I avoid having contact with anyone and now that I am in front, I see the looks with which I usually frequent, fear, hurt, indifference and hatred for some reason. Although this should affect me, I don't take much of it. I don't care what they say, what they do, after all I've accepted it for a long time.

Although the whispers did not stop, for my part I continued with this stupid and unnecessary presentation. (I doubt they heard anything.)

As soon as we finished we went to our seats, and the whispers that were barely heard got louder so much that the teacher had to intervene with a yell. -"SILENCE".

(1:40 pm)

The classes ended.

Before leaving the classroom, the teacher took all of us new, an exam that was given previously, it did not take me long so (I finished).

Now I'm on my way home, I left later than the others but no problem.

As he walked I go with a lost look, having those same thoughts since the day began.

"YOUR HE IN THE HOOD." (A loud scream, coming from behind)

(I turned around for a moment and then I continued walking, those who were coming here were 3 boys)

I don't know what they want but I know that they won't come to talk kindly, if they wanted to talk to me they would have done it further back, but they waited for me to come to a place where not many people pass. But whatever it is now, I don't know if it can tolerate any stupidity.

They arrived and one of them stood in front of me ... Without thinking, (I pulled my sweater and threw it to the ground). And he said the following: —Hey, isamu, Hikaru, this is the criminal, come see him, the appearance speaks for itself.

Is he one of those who were in the classroom? Offender? (I asked myself)

The 2 who were behind approached and began to speak.

"If you were right Makoto." (I affirm) —the guy has the appearance and look of a criminal. (And laughing he said) - Don't you want us to fix it?

Makoto: —Isamu, you will do what I told you just like your Hikaru.

Hikaru: "Okay, okay, I wouldn't even want to touch him but what difference does it make." (Making an expression of disgust)

Makoto aggressively approached: "You." Do you remember me? Hey? PIECE OF IMBECIL. (He made a blow). "Come on, Hikaru, isamu take him to that alley." (They took me by both arms).

Once there, the leader of these "Makoto" appeared with his 2 companions (isamu and Hikaru) and between blows he gave the supposed reason why he was doing this: "YOU, YOU ARE THE WEIRD WHO WAS FOLLOWING ME IN THE MORNING. WERE YOU TRYING TO ROB ME? DID YOU THINK I WASN'T GETTING BACK THAT PATETIC HOOD? DAMNED.

I tried to cover the kicks I received with my arms, and at the same time (thinking) This must be a joke, that boy is ... I thought he hadn't seen me.

"HEAR THAT BOY LET GO." (A shout was heard from a distance from a young man who was apparently passing by here with his partner).

Makoto: "DON'T CHEAT THEM, HE IS A THIEF, LOOK . ( Abruptly they took me by the head and turned me around).

The boy stopped, his expression changed as well as his partner's, he stepped back little by little and they left without saying anything else.

At that moment, I was perplexed for a moment, I laughed at myself, for a moment I expected praise from him. (I started to laugh at how pathetic it was) for expecting something different.

Makoto— that you laugh damn freak. (Confused)

One of them suggested they stop, which was enough, thinking that the blows had driven me crazy, he said it with laughter. And in fact after that they left

To be honest, I'm also starting to think I'm going crazy. The 3 boys left, quite normal.

Lying on the ground, the laughter faded, The pain in my body could bear it, I stood up. I wiped the blood from my nose and tried to clean the uniform as well as possible. Once that was done, I gathered my things off the floor and went home.

(11:00 PM)

Tonight, as I was weighing it I decided to go to that place, hope it is late because it is the best for me. I took my jacket and without doing anything else I left.

Since I moved here, the only place that has caught my eye is that bridge. I don't know how to explain it but it has something special, from there you can appreciate a beautiful view especially when night falls.

As I go to the bridge I hear how the strong wind blows the leaves of the trees, the sky is cloudy, this place is usually like this, that feeling of wanting to rain. (I like).

The houses are silent, the streets around here are empty. Obviously because it is late. For me it is a perfect moment.

When we arrived at the place, it was completely empty, there was a deep silence, the light sound caused by the wind was barely heard. I walked to the middle of the bridge and sat up, leaning my back against the metal.

(11:30 pm)

Tonight and on this bridge will be where everything will end. I will do what I have long expected. I will take my life.

Since I got up I have felt strange, those thoughts that I feared so much before, returned and increasingly stronger, taking me to this point, sitting on this bridge questioning my pathetic existence.

I remember how when I was little (11 years old) loneliness terrified me, desperately trying my best to try to fit in, but it was useless. I didn't want to accept my reality, I just ignored it. (Although I did not fully understand, I just stopped trying) But when I met him it was clear. Tadashi a classmate approached me saying that he wanted to be my friend, at that moment I thought he was only doing it out of pity, so I just ignored him. (I really would have preferred it to be like that) In one of my days, I found myself on the ground being beaten by some boys from school, I did not defend myself because I had an ideology, if I answered I would be like them. I just didn't have to do anything but he suddenly got in front of me trying to defend me, but it was useless, those guys didn't listen to him for a second. They began to beat each other, among many blows he received a very strong one that knocked him down, lying on the ground with his dirty shirt and a little blood, that idiot forced me to forget my stupid ideology, I jumped on the person in charge, I furiously started to hit him non-stop, I was completely haunted by anger, but once again that busybody held my foot, trying to make it stop, that's when I heard, (don't be the same as them, this is not you. * After that, he fainted *). (The next day he would not believe what he would hear). Tadashi died, apparently the blows he had received were very serious. Given that news, a part of me wanted to take the blame, but no, don't accept it, That idiot if only he hadn't meddled, this wouldn't have happened. (In that way, days passed) and during that time, it was where those thoughts arose, began to invade me, the voices in my damn head. I somehow wanted to die. But I could not do it myself, so much was my weakness, that I prayed to a god of which I am not a believer, I was so desperate that every night with tears in my eyes I asked him that please, for me there would not be another day. Despite saying that he was afraid, he pretended to be strong but in reality he was terrified, he was afraid, Lose was pathetic, disgusting, pitiful, miserable, weak, but he did not know what to do.

Now these thoughts came back but stronger . What am I supposed to feel? Should I be afraid? Am I supposed to cry? No no no. I promised myself never to cry again, whatever happens. Now he is completely different, that little coward does not exist anymore. Now this is different. The fear of that time disappeared.

My body supports these thoughts. I feel like everything I had repressed begins to invade me, it suffocates me. I can not stand it anymore! (He picked me up and pressed my hands against the edge of the Bridge, stared down)

I don't mind dying, less in a place like this, I had to do it for a long time and now I finally have the courage to do it (I show a small smile) finally this ends ...

Before taking the last step, I felt as if I ... these hands? (I opened my eyes) and the first thing I saw was a girl, with tears in her eyes.

9 Novembre 2020 23:37 1 Rapport Incorporer Suivre l’histoire
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