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mr_riz_rhymer Riz Rhymer If you like comedy, dark humor, and are a hypocrite racist bastard like most conservative people in the USA(not all), then you can come here and enjoy a Mexican's racist and hateful point of view in a comedy blog format. DISCLAIMER: Nothing here mentioned is said or written with the intention of offending and is pure comedy and humor. We, and I mean "I", do not take responsibility for any lawsuit presented agains this specific blog, any of the stories posted by this profile, or this profile itself. By opening and reading any of the chapters of this blog, you accept that this is pure comedy and humor, and liberate me from any possible legal responsibilities or consequences. That being said, Let's begin!
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#spanish-speaker #spanish #mexican #stollen-land #land-of-tacos #land-of-narc #school-shooting-land #stolen-land #english-speaker #wetback #mojado #beaner #frijolero #gringo #english
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Dude, already wanna go visit you up there.

Well, I'm kinda excited, because PROBABLY (not for sure) I will go to the USA for the first time in my life. Yes, I have not ever before visited the USA. I will very likely be visiting you over there by March or April of this year.


Please don't try to kill me immediately after I get out of the plane.


Speaking about planes... Have you ever been besides a guy who farts atomic bombs in a plane? Dude, that is FUCKING GROSS!!! That guy that sat besides me was almost literally in a state of putrefaction, because the smell was so, so, SO BAD that it seamed like he was dying.


When we landed, I started looking for my friend (with which I traveled all the way from the south of the country), and when I found him, we started walking out of the plane together, and it was that moment when I noticed that the guy walking in front of us was the atomic farts guy, so I started insulting him indirectly, using the fact that I, in the moment of having to smoke all that toxic gas, pretended not to know who it belonged to.


–Hey, how was the trip for you?

–Horrible, dude. somebody in the plane was dying or shit, because the one that farted like that must have some sort of gangrena issues in the asshole. He must be a FUCKING ZOMBIE like, I mean he must be dead in a putrefaction state or shit for that person to smell so fucking bad.


And you must be wondering what the fuck does this have to do with the theme of this blog. well, the fun part of the story comes when I find out that he was a typical "Gringo" style American. When he found out we were talking about him, he turned around in the middle of the thin airplane corridor and started to argue with me.


He forgot three VERY important survival rules if you are a foreign tourist:

–Don't look for beef in a different hood

–Don't piss off a Mexican in Mexico

–Don't argue with a Mexican if you are a Gringo in Tamaulipas


Anyways, have a good night and peace out.

Jan. 31, 2020, 3:35 a.m. 0 Report Embed 0
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Don't make me laugh, orange guy.

Yes, by the title of this post you should already know who am I talking about.


A few days ago, Donald J. Trump tweeted something as stupid as to say Mexico WILL help USA if they needed our help in the war against Iran, ending the tweet with something like "Mexico and USA together" or shit like that...


Let's get this clear: Mexico is not USAs fucking pet, and will never be, so don't you think for a goddamn motherfucking bitchy second that we will help if you TELL us to.


Let's also get this clear: NEVER EVER forget that, as much as you want to deny it, USA needs Mexico and its people. I'll give you a simple example: Mexicans are the ones who grow and harvest the crops and food you Americans eat at your tables, or at least a big part of it. Mexicans are the ones that do the dirty jobs Americans don't want to do, or think they receive little money for their work, speaking in terms of agriculture, plumbery, building and construction, house hygiene and aesthetics(home cleaning and gardening, obviously for others), and even sometimes food(because yes, we Mexicans prefer to establish our own food stands than eating those disgusting Taco Bell hard shell tacos. THOSE ARE NOT REAL FUCKING TACOS! THOSE ARE PURE CRAP INSIDE A FRIED FLOWER TORTILLA! Because all of this, never ever forget either that Mexicans MIGHT not be aggressive in American(stolen) land, but even if so, don't blast their balls off. you don't want to see a Mexican angry at you. They won't beat the shit outta you(well maybe, if they are USA citizens and are not in danger of being deported); if you tell them "you are a fucking mediocre and will never be as successful as I am fucking beaner wetback, go back to your country", BOOOOOOM!!! You'll get people like Guillermo Del Toro, Diego Luna, Michael Peña (Ant-Man's best friend) and many, many more.


Let's ALSO get this clear: deporting ALL Mexicans in USA would be the same as deporting the entire country of Spain and a bit more out of America. Real fact: there are more Spanish speaking people in USA(mostly Mexicans) than there are people in Spain.


That's all for today. If you disagree with me in something, please PROPERLY tell me in the comments below and be sure I will reply with the same level of respect you show. have a nice night and don't get too drunk on tamarindo Smirnoff vodka and on your own patriotic ego(JK with this last one).


Mexican time of posting: 8:35 p.m.

Jan. 11, 2020, 2:36 a.m. 0 Report Embed 0
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Fake tacos and crazy-ass fake equality demanding women (INCOMING TRIGGER)

WARNING:

The following content might be offensive for some people. discretion recommended. if you are easily triggered by comments that express a different opinion than yours, love Taco Bell, or simply you are a woman who thinks men and women should have equal rights and privileges because we don't have them yet, stop reading and close this blog right now.


















Hello there, fake taco lovers.


Yea, let's be honest: Taco Bell tacos are not even similar to the real thing.


Taco Bell is purely a fried disc of flower dough shaped into a U that is filled with minced beef, lettuce, tomato and other kinds of shit, when the real taco ISN'T EVEN FRIED.


The real taco is made with a tortilla made out of mashed corn(which can have different colors, such as the green, blue or red corn, just to mention some examples) which is placed in a griddle until it is cooked. After you have the tortilla, it is filled, usually with meat, which can be stewed in different ways. after you have the filled taco, yo can serve it like that, which is called a "Taco natural", or you can add salsa, coriander, onion, sometimes (and depending on the main ingredient of the taco) lettuce and tomato, and finally, a diet soda so you don't feel like the bottomless stomach taco hog you are XD. that is the real, authentic, and only way of the taco.


but I'm not here to tell you about tacos; I'm here to talk to you about the problem we're facing here in México about the feticide and rape cases. Some of you will say women must have protection so that they don't face those kinds of dangers, but I'm not one of those. I do understand and share the opinion that women are living in a society where they fear for their lives or physical or psychological integrity, and that that fear shouldn't exist, because that problem shouldn't exist, but I also do think that women DON'T need that specific protection, because the movement the participate in fights for equal rights, and giving them the right to be protected from any violence against them as a specific target, meaning to protect ALL the members of that movement, represents, in a more than obvious way, a hypocrite way of thinking.


I repeat: I do think it is not correct that people attack women just for being women, but it is not ok for women to demand more rights just because they're women. Think about it: women LEGALY have the same rights than men, and even more, because they have different biological needs and qualities and stuff like that, or because they(supposedly) are better raising a child than men, or because they are more vulnerable than a man against an attack or harrasment(again, supposedly), but none of these, except the first one is a valid reason for them to have different and more rights and privileges than men.


I'll explain the two cases that I mentioned in the previous paragraph:


In Mexico(I don't know if in USA it's like this or not), when a marriage gets divorced, Even if the mother doesn't want to stay with the kids, she has 9/10 chances of staying with them, because legally, she is more able to raise the kids than the father is, which sounds ridiculous when I say I am one of those cases, in which my biological mother abused me and my sisters physically and psychologically, causing my father to get into a legal fight against my mother to get us away from her(which I thank), and which legal fight did not end until 14 years later, until my 18th birthday, meaning that I was no longer a legal subject of custody terms. That LOOOOOONG fight was made long because of the corrupt Mexican legal system, but that is another topic.


The second example I give refers to the newly approved Olympia law, in Mexico, which protects WOMEN against cybernetic and online blackmailing or harassment, such as if her nudes leak into the internet, and punishing the person who leaked the information with years in prison. Please, tell me that I'm not the only one that laughed after hearing(or in this case, reading) this. Basically, women in Mexico are now protected against people leaking their nudes on the internet. If so, WHY THE FUCK DOES SOMEBODY HAVE YOUR NUDES?!?!?! Your personal information and stuff is yours and only yours, but you should be responsible about it. Srsly, now please tell me women are not having more rights and privileges than men...


Now, let's get to the fun part: social privileges women have and men don't, which are the ones that the law doesn't provide but sometimes protects because *laughing while saying it* it's a woman:


  • You must give your seat on the bus to a woman because she is a woman.
  • Women can punch a guy for no reason, but the guy can't respond to the aggression without immediate social and/or legal retaliation.
  • If a man is staring a woman's breasts, or just stares at her, he's harassing her and he's doing something bad, but if a woman TOUCHES the man's crotch or stares at him, she's flirting and the guy should be flattered.
  • women have safer workplaces and jobs than men, and that's why they "get paid less"(because men are more likely to ask for raises and more likely to take riskier and more dangerous jobs than women, so that's why they "get paid more"). Wage gap solved.
  • If a guy cheats on her girlfriend/wife, he is a fucking bastard and should have his balls cut off or shit, but if a woman cheats on her boyfriend/husband, it's ok because he didn't care enough for her and did not do the necessary to earn her love.
  • "Ladies first"
  • Women have special privileges that men don't, like being able to say shit like "It doesn't count if it comes from a white man" or like "men talking and giving their opinion about feminism is so ridiculous", or like "men are all the same", without anybody being able to say something without receiving retaliation for their response.
  • Women are the only social group that, if they demand change for THEIR BENEFIT, they get it, while men, most likely, don't.
  • In most homes in Mexico(I don't know about the USA or other countries), the man is the one that goes out to work and earn the money to sustain he family, even in an environment where women are ENCOURAGED to get a job, meaning that they don't get a job because they don't want to. this example is related to the "custody of the kids" example.
  • Women are most likely to be given help in society if they need it than men, in any aspect you want to apply the affirmation: help with health, love, money(when it's not from a bank. If there is a bank, there an economical relation between the bank and the personal income, which favors the man because of the things mentioned previously involving money terms), emotional or psychological issues, etc.
  • I know this could seem contrary to what I'm trying to say, but media says more women die because of homicide per day than men do. That, if you want honesty and the truth, is a total lie. More male deaths per day are caused by homicide than female deaths. No matter what the cause, background, context or reason: homicide is still homicide.
  • Women are the only ones who can be hypocritical in this society. Example of this daring accusation are the radical feminists that participate in violent marches and protests, who vandalize and destroy historical monuments in public parks and touristic hotspots, demanding a pacific and safe environment with no violence against them, but they attack innocent men(no matter the age) who are just crossing the streets to get to their homes or jobs; they demand a society respectful for others in which men don't just take out their dicks in public(which we don't and I have never heard of a case like that), but they go around the place of the marches and protests while being completely nude; they demand help from the government to keep them safe but they sing "The oppressive government is a male rapist"(a part of the famous and well known and hated song created by radical feminists who had a little common sense when they decided violent proteste weren't gonna help, called "Un violador en tu camino", or in English, "A rapist in your path"); they demand no more female deaths caused by feticide, but in the vandalized monuments and touristic hotspots you can read "muerte a todos los hombres"("Death to all men")


I know some of these might sound ridiculous, but that's the level of those women who demand equal rights and privileges. I am a local activist for the eradication of gender violence, coming from any gender and against any gender, but I am also an activist against radical feminists who claim they want equality and justice when they only want EVEN MORE RIDICULOUS PRIVILEGES.


That's all for today. If you think in a different way than me, and think that what I think is wrong, I'll give you two options:

  1. Close this blog and block me.
  2. Comment RESPECTFULLY your opinion, which, if you do it properly, will receive a reply of the same level of respect and seriousness.


I hope Everybody has a good day, and ¡QUE CHINGUE SU MADRE EL AMÉRICA!


*El América is a Mexican football soccer team hated by most Mexicans because of their low quality in general and for being overrated because the owner of the team is the owner of Televisa, the biggest TV channel chain of Mexico*


Mexican time of posting: 5:15 p.m.

Dec. 18, 2019, 11:21 p.m. 0 Report Embed 0
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There are three and with Harrison Ford

Yes, the title was a word game, a very bad one, but hey! There is a reason for everything. I failed 4 final exams and now I have to present the extraordinary ones, but here's the problem: I can only present 3, but I can drag 2 subjects while I study my next semester, so my plan's this: I present two of those 4 subjects's extraordinary exams and leave the other two subjects dragging in the next semester, but as I said at the beginning: everything has a reason. those two subjects are Analytic Geometry and Physics, the two hardest ones, and with two of the most disliked teachers of all the school (after the technology teacher, but I'll talk about that later), which means I won't be able to learn and understand, in five days, a whole semester of the two hardest subjects of the entire semester, and because of that, I'll have to start from zero the subjects, but in a new semester.


It will be harder for me, but I'll try my best. I'm not Ed Maverick. I WILL finish high school.


Now, let's talk about that apparently virgin, very hated, sterile dumb face and socially rejected bastard, which is my technology teacher. We ALL hate him, because he is a prick. He doesn't show us how to do the stuff he wants us to do, and he only tells us how to use fucking Excel. SERIOUSLY?!?!?! EXCEL?!?!?! THEY HIRED A TEACHER TO SHOW US HOW TO USE EXCEL?!?!?! YOUTUBE COULD'VE DONE THAT FOR FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!


No, but srsly now, nobody likes him. There are lots of reasons why, so I won't be mentioning them all, but he is, at least inside the school, public enemy #1. Swear.



Dec. 6, 2019, 1:21 a.m. 0 Report Embed 0
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